I Couldn’t Yet Comprehend

By Jesse Martinez / Winter 2021

Wooooht! whoooht! As the steam horn blows on the fairy passing the Statue of Liberty, signaling a better life in reach to hopeful immigrants aboard. The United States is promised to be the land of freedom, justice, and opportunity around the world, and while this ethos foundationally may be true, too often the promises are more attainable by a select few. The year 2020 has shown that the promises of freedom, justice, and opportunity, are a luxury that I have often not had to question, unlike our brothers and sisters have had to do daily, simply because of the color of their skin.

Being male, mixed-race, and passing white, I have never experienced fear for my freedom or future when interacting with the police. Watching “Cops” on Fox with my grandma told me that only “bad guys” that do bad things experienced the wrath of the police. I remember in 10th grade I made a new friend that is Black and was new to town, a town of 60 thousand mostly White or Hispanic residents. As I provided a little tour to him and his family of our town my friend’s mother pointed out a police car and said “let’s stay away from him”. At that moment I remember feeling genuine confusion why she would want to stay away from the police. I always had felt safer when I saw police nearby, I even told her “our police are nice, they don’t have a reputation for doing anything bad”. This naiveté I had couldn’t comprehend her own experiences with police.

This sheltered view I had slowly fell away as I moved to San Jose and began taking classes at the community college. Seeing the numerous videos and news stories in 2020 of Black Americans across the country having their life taken unjustly by a police officer, showed how the promise of freedom and justice is still not available to everyone in America. For me, this was confirmed by the interaction with police and insurrectionists that attempted to take the United States Capitol. As I watched the live reporting I kept thinking, “where are the police?”, as the domestic terrorist’s made their way into the senate chamber chanting to hang the Vice president. While many officers protected the lives of our elected officials, which we should all be eternally grateful for, we also saw some officers taking selfies with and not engaging with the predominantly White insurrectionist. Just a few months prior, thousands of Black Lives Matter protesters peacefully marched in the capital city where they were met by police, military, and federal agents. Chemical agents, rubber bullets, and aggressive force were plentiful in a march that called for America’s promises of freedom and justice.

While there is still contrast in promises when living in America, I am hopeful for the future and encouraged by the upward trajectory America has seen in achieving a universal American experience. While the gains appear to require great sacrifice, in time, emotion, and for many far worse, the path towards a more perfect union is possible when we are united.