Expectations Shattered

By Anonymous / Spring 2021

There are many names that are given to the United States to show that it is an amazing if not the best country such as, the Land of the Free, Land of Opportunity, or even the Land of Promise. These names have given hope to many, resulting in immigrants leaving their homes to find their place in this country where they would be promised to be free, and given an opportunity to succeed. Another popular and misguided term is the American Dream, it’s a belief that anyone can attain their own version of success in a society. It’s an idea that advertises the greatness of America and attempts to persuade anyone that it is possible to climb the hierarchy or ladder that they desire. Success is primarily determined by having a job and the amount wealth makes. It makes me wonder does America actually promise these things? Or even after looking a bit further, are these things actually what success is about and what people thrive for?

I know that these advertisements are the exact reason why my parents decided to come to America. My parents are immigrants from China and they are uneducated as they have never completed high school. Coming to America, my parents gave up everything they’ve ever known in China because they believed in these promises and the American Dream. Little did they know that there was much for them to learn about in America with an entirely different system. This system also did not make it easy for people who did not know English to understand. My parents came from a village and were primarily farm workers and had difficulty finding reliable jobs when they were back in China. This made them desperate, and luckily we had an extended family that was living here. The extended family had found success here early on, able to buy a house and live comfortably. Seeing their success made my parents come as we had their support. For the first 8 years or so since I was born, we lived with the extended family. My family wasn’t able to move out and support ourselves for over 10 years.

My parent’s expectations of America were shattered. It is not as if my parents didn't work hard either. My mom worked long hours everyday, she often got overtime. It was an under the table job where overtime didn’t mean that she got paid more, yet she was happy to get it as we needed the money. She worked every single day with a small lunch break, and no vacations. My mom was given the opportunity for a job, but this job wasn’t enough and it basically took her whole life. Even more so, this job wasn’t a real job. Just to support ourselves required all of her time, and she wasn’t given the opportunity to learn the system. On the other hand we have my father, who was capable of working hard, but was not given the chance. My father lacked many skills and wasn’t strong physically. He occasionally took on some jobs for construction, but his body wasn’t able to keep up with these demands. Not knowing English, there weren't many options for him to work for. He tried a variety of occupations such as, a butcher, construction worker, and waiter. However, none of the jobs he’s found was able to suit him and be a reliable source of income. This eventually destroyed his motivation and he stopped working and looking for work completely. This led to many family problems that probably never would have happened if my parents had never come to America. Now, I am 24, and my family was able to move out. We live in public housing that has income-based rent which makes it affordable and comfortable for my family. However, it was only two years ago where my mother finally found a job as a hotel room cleaner where she got actual benefits and rights as an employee. However, my mother still wanting more money occasionally goes back to work as a seamstress for the extra cash. Life still isn’t easy for her, but it has become more comfortable for her and she has become happy and content living here now. However, my father has taken a different path that he is not proud of, but money is important and he has made many sacrifices to support the family and himself.

Looking at my family, I don’t believe that these promises were fulfilled for my parents. It has taken them at least 24 years to get to where they are now. My mom was lucky that her friend got her a job to work at a hotel, but I am sure there are so many other families where their parents are unemployed or working under the table. It’s even more important that my family's sense of success is different and they don’t realize how oppressive the system is. Essentially my parent’s ideas of success have not become to grab it themselves, but have their children, me and my sister thrive for it instead. We are then expected to attain a good career and take care of them. My parents essentially had their time taken from them in exchange for essential needs, and now this time will also be taken from me as I had to support my parents growing up. I definitely don’t believe in the freedom and opportunity that was promised to us.